


The Heart of the Heir

by Doodling_Dork3562



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Brotherly Angst, Denial of Feelings, Emotionally Repressed, Friends to Lovers, Kid Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Kid Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Kid Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Prophecy, Repression, Romantic Friendship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:49:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26640133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doodling_Dork3562/pseuds/Doodling_Dork3562
Summary: Roman and Remus' fates had been determined since the day they were born. However, as Roman faces betrayal by none other than his brother, Remus, he vows to never have relations with another dark side for as long as he is alive helping Thomas.However, Roman never planned on  the darkness coming to him....or that just like his brother he would be drawn towards it.Guess history repeats itself.....
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 3
Kudos: 23





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, gals and nonbinary pals! This was a book I started a long time ago but ended up giving upon it (I still don't know the exact reason why) but I'm going back through the drafts of the chapters and rewriting them (adding more details to certain parts and stuff like that, so this should be fun! I hope you all enjoy this idea of mine!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two boys facing the same prophecy. Roman doing the best to protect his new family that is Logan and Patton after losing Remus to the dark, he makes a promise to never go anywhere near the dark again. That is until Thomas gains a new major facet of his personality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, this is my attempts at the introduction my idea of how the Sides came to be. I gave up on the this for some reason, I couldn't tell you why. So, I'm sitting down and going back through the drafts of each chapter and rewriting it so I can add more details and all that jazz! It is going to have some Logicality and Prinxiety sprinkled throughout the book, so strap in! 
> 
> ~Mostly fluffville, but it may get a tad smutty, so if you aren't for that, feel free to leave the building...~
> 
> Onto the Intro!

Two twins. One prophecy. 

One twin would have a heart that was solely made up of light. The other, solely made of darkness. The choice was up to either of them. The choices and decisions they would make throughout their lives would shape their fates and how they would find and fit into the puzzle that was the figments created by Thomas. Each taking on a certain trait as they grew. 

Though, you aren’t sure of what said trait will actually be, you can’t fake who you truly are, deep down, you will always view the world in your own way. As they grew, Roman became more and more weary of Remus. 

Roman was more nurturing, only wanted to help, and was lost in worlds of his own making half the time. Remus was destructive. Not afraid to roughhouse with Roman. With the two it often went too far to just call it “all fun and games”. They clashed. Hard. 

That’s when Roman encountered a situation that would forever change his life. His brother’s curiosity led them towards the dark side. Even with knowing that he could easily be lost and forgotten in the choppy waves that were the subconscious, he left. 

(SIXTEEN YEARS AGO) 

“Remus! Mom and Dad said not to go in there! Remus!” 

The 12 year old screamed his brother’s name until his throat was raw. Trying to get him to come back towards where he stood in The Light. Remus, however, had different ideas. He ran forwards, giving no attention to the warnings yelled by his brother. Leaping over wet, jagged rocks, he landed in what was known as “The Dark”. 

It wasn’t long before Remus was collapsing onto the ground out of excruciating pain, the shadows swallowing him whole. He was being corrupted. Slowly and painfully. Although, Roman hadn’t stepped in with Remus, he felt every single second of his twin brother’s corruption. Pain shot through his nerves as he felt his blood boiling. A red aura surrounded him, and through his misty, blurred vision, he caught sight of Remus, who had turned into a completely different person. Corrupted. Tainted. Two-faced. Whatever you wanted to call it. 

Two bright green eyes looked at him with pure hatred as a yellow gloved hand dragged him further into the shadows, away from where Roman sat. He knew at that moment that he would be the light. 

Unknown to the small boy, a small bat watched Remus from a distance. Less focused on Remus, he was marvelling at the fact that he jumped the border. Blinking his big, magenta eyes in disbelief, he gave a small grin.

“You can cross it…”  
Tears streamed down his face, Roman doing his best to walk as far away from the subconscious out of fear. In all honesty, Roman wasn’t going anywhere in particular. He was wandering aimlessly more than anything else as his body was wracked with uneven breaths from losing his brother. 

Roman was betrayed by the one he loved most and complete and utter betrayal is not a pleasant feeling. 

Two boys in the distance looked around curiously, both with different colored auras. One was surrounded by indigo and the other by light blue. They were traits. Roman didn’t know others besides him existed. They were visibly younger than Roman and both peered up at him through the lenses of their glasses. 

The indigo boy was clearly very protective over the other one, putting his arm in front of him as a non-verbal way of saying “don’t move”. 

“I-,” Roman cleared his throat as it cracked horribly. “I won't hurt you. Do you two have names?”

“You can call me Logic. He is Morality.” Roman gave the pair the best smile he could muster at this point. 

“You can call me Creativity. Or Prince.” Morality giggled, engulfing Roman in a hug. 

“Princey!” Or that. That worked just as well. On the day when life decided to take away his family, it gave him a new start with Logic and Morality. He had no problems with holding Morality’s hand as they walked or doing some puzzles with Logic. 

He played the role of big brother to the two and he was completely fine with that.

From that moment on, Roman vowed to never interact with a dark side again for the entirety of the time he helped Thomas. To never let Patton or Logan know he held more power then they actually were aware of. Staying away from the darkness, he vowed never to go into it. Roman never suspected that in the end. He wouldn’t have to. 

The darkness came to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed! Tell me what you think of the beginning so far, I'd love to hear some feedback from you all! 
> 
> Thank you for reading and I will see you all in the next chapter!


	2. Hidden Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman and Virgil are still trying to figure out how to make amendments from past disagreements but Virgil becomes suspicious of what Roman isn't telling him when Patton lets a fact about Roman's history slip...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, we see Roman and Virgil becoming a little tongue-tied as Patton lets a fact slip that has Virgil get suspicious about Roman's origins...
> 
> Also, I do bring up them having a "control room" to manage Thomas WHILE in The Mindscape.  
> (https://i.pinimg.com/originals/8e/5b/e0/8e5be0696c344dcd0d9c109f939311a1.png) <\---- it looks like the one from Inside Out! There is the picture of it so you can see what it was actually based on! Everything is the same, except their control room has levitating chairs for each of the sides around the console. 
> 
> Thought I'd mention that so you guys have some reference as to what I actually imagined it as! NOW ONTO THE NEXT CHAPTER!

~Current Day~

“So, Logan. Anything interesting happening with Thomas? Good? Bad? Neutral? You haven’t moved out of the control room all day. I’ve even gone into the common area a couple times today.” Logan leaned back in his chair as he watched the screen that was Thomas’ thoughts. Not a single one alerted him that any of the sides were actually needed to assist in his decision-making.

Blowing strands of black hair out of his bright green eyes, he exhaled deeply. He was literally the embodiment of Logic, he desperately wanted to move but there were too many “what if’s” that alarmed him that he stayed put in his floating chair in the control room.

There were three others, now unoccupied as Logic was on watch duty this particular day. One chair resembled a throne. One was purple and black in the shape of an orb having a small black throw pillow inside of it. The light blue one resembled a barstool, higher off the ground. His was a simple armchair and the most ergonomic of them all. 

“In all honesty, no. Not really. The most interesting thing that has happened today was you walking in here to talk to me.” Smiling sympathetically, he sat down in his chair next to Logan. 

“I’m glad I could be of assistance in such a dire time of need, Logan.” He felt a smile tug at his lips at the remark, both being snapped out the moment by an alert on the computer that two sides had gone into the common area. Clearing his throat, Logan felt a pang of panic as he quickly accessed the cameras in the common room. 

A male with disheveled hair and black eyeshadow under his eyes sat on the stairs, a spot that had previously been occupied by Logan, however, it was now known as the spot where their fourth member stood, Virgil. Or if you wanted to use a more generalized term, Anxiety. 

None of them really “enjoyed” being called by their most well-known trait because it didn’t give credit where credit is due. Roman was much more than just “Creativity”. He embodies more of Thomas than you would think. Though, Logan and Roman were both “sides”, they do have a tendency to underestimate the other. 

Virgil...wasn’t so bad. He meant well, always keeping Thomas’ best interests at heart when he had to deal with him or when given the chance, control and watch over him. Remus and Deceit, however, they were a different story. Though, Roman did keep the ball of chaos that was his brother in check most of the time, the two did have their moments. 

“It’s just Virgil in the common room,” Logan explained, until he caught a glimpse of blood red fabric that belonged to no other article of clothing besides Roman’s sash. 

“Wait. Is that Roman? When did those two actually get along?” Patton sighed and gave Logan the side eye, jabbing his side with his elbow. Hard enough to let Logan know that he did it, but not hard enough to actually harm him. He would never forgive himself for it. 

“Logan, be nice. Our traits don’t define who we are as people. Well, at least not completely...They are simply jobs. As Logic, you of all people, should know that all of us are far from being perfect. Never were. Never will be.” Exhaling, he nodded slowly. He should know better. Glancing over to Morality he gave a smile, raising his eyebrows.

“As Morality, that was a very insightful observation.” Morality smiled proudly, sitting back in his chair. Logan hated admitting when he was wrong, so he just kept his eyes locked on the screen, hoping both knew he wasn’t exactly right in this situation. 

Logan watched intently as Roman smirked and rolled his eyes. Walking off into the kitchen, he had crossed his arms tightly across his chest. Virgil looked calm, however. A rare occurrence. 

Duty calls. 

“I’m never going to be getting that image out of my head! Thanks a ton, Virge!” Virgil gave a whicker like laugh, as he was trying to suppress it somewhat, causing himself to make a snorting noise. Teleporting into the living room next to the stairs, Virgil jumped, shooting a death glare at Logan. Recomposing himself, he narrowed his eyes.

“Warn a side next time!” Clearing his throat, Logan pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. Confused, he pointed to where he was standing. 

“Exactly how many times have you seen me pop up in that exact spot before?” Rolling his eyes, Virgil shrugged his hoodie up onto his shoulders, pulling the hood over his head of purple and black hair. 

“Too many! I don’t want to die of a heart attack! If I do, you aren’t inheriting ANYTHING from my will and you’re paying the medical bills!” Logan eyed Virgil quizzically, as if he was searching Virgil’s soul for the answer.

“One, Virgil, we CANNOT die. Two, exactly what have you and Roman been up to for the past half hour?” Virgil went poker-faced as he threw his hand up theatrically. 

“Plotting world domination! Logan, we’ve seriously been discussing Disney movies. Roman has his feathers in a bit of a ruffle still as I decided to point out the darker messages in them. Hold on. DO Patton and you always just assume that we are arguing?!” Shrugging, Logan opened up his mouth to say something before being cut off by Patton, who rose from the floor across the room from Virgil. Virgil couldn’t help but bit back a smile as Logan jumped at his entrance and let a quiet curse word slip. Roman decided to chime in as well.

“Though, what Virgil said is true, normally I wouldn’t enjoy somebody dragging the magic that is Disney through the mud like that, he has some interesting thoughts on them to say the least, and some pretty extensive knowledge to back up his accusations. So, even if the messages aren’t intentional, it’s still an interesting take on it, I suppose…” Virgil quirked a brow at Roman, his expression akin to a dog perking up its ears at an unknown sound. Leaning against the stairs, he stood speechless. He was never quite sure how to respond to being complimented. Let’s just say it didn’t happen very often in Virgil’s line of work. 

Though, it was said in such a way that made Virgil feel like he almost…belonged there. Like he fit in more with the Light Sides than the Dark Sides for once in his life. The Dark Sides never really liked each other. They just seemed to tolerate each other. If they made it through the day without someone getting punched, slapped, or kicked (verbally or physically), that was what they considered to be a good day for them.

Also the fact he hated to admit. He had just come to the conclusion that Roman just flat out hated him. Both sides, however, knew that wasn’t entirely true because, BREAKING NEWS, all of them are messed up in different ways! 

Hell, tension was still hanging in the air from when he decided he wasn’t wanted as a side, and decided to remove himself from the picture, not giving a second thought as to how it could possibly affect Thomas in a way that was harmful instead of helpful. 

It was a bad idea, putting it lightly. He could practically feel Roman’s guilt radiating off him, even when he stood across the room for him. Though, he could be picking up on some of his own as well. He had been told that Roman was a big reason that Virgil decided to opt out in the first place, and he didn’t blame Roman for the fact that he didn’t really know what to do with that knowledge. Change himself? 

They blame Roman for not knowing how to eloquently articulate his thoughts into speech, but god it was hard to admit you're wrong. Looking at Roman, he picked at his sleeves as he examined the carpet. He slowly but surely slipped into his thoughts. 

“I apologize, Virgil. I never meant to hurt your feelings, but I have warmed up to you slightly and I'm really trying.” 

‘Now if you could just figure out what to say back, Virgil. That would be great…’ 

“They really don’t call me Anxiety for no reason…” Roman cleared his throat, making Anxiety peer up at him. 

“So you came from-” Virgil’s walls went up, he hated his origins and the other sides were well aware of it. They barely know anything about him other than he was a dark side, he embodied anxiety, and he hated the other Dark Sides with a passion. 

“The Dark. Yep. We’ve been over this, Roman…” Logan darted his eyes away from the fanciful side as his face seemed to darken. Why was Sir Sing-A-Lot being so damn defensive?! He brought up the topic!

“Virgil, not now…” 

“Dark Side? Like where we found Ro-” Logan quickly moved to put his hand over Patton's mouth, pinching the bridge of his nose with the other hand. That was a road that Logan really didn’t feel or have the patience to travel down currently. Virgil wasn’t done with Roman yet... 

“You’re not telling me something…I want to know what it is.” Logan stepped in front of Virgil, and glared daggers at him.

“I would ask Roman about that one, as it is neither mine nor Patton’s business to say. Piece of advice? Do it when you are on better terms with Roman. It isn’t a happy story.” Virgil sighed and nodded, calming himself down. He’ll cross that road when he comes to it, and clearly he shouldn’t push as Roman was hiding it for a reason. Obviously. He had already retreated back into the mindscape for fear that Virgil would interrogate him to force answers out of him, when he clearly wasn’t in the mood for questioning. 

“I’ll give you a pass for now. You have got to answer the question sometime, Princey…”


	3. Immortal Phantoms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil is starting to feel things he doesn’t like as Roman finally opens up about his past to Virgil.  
> Also some cute Prinxiety bonding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t why but this was a really fun chapter to actually write out. The tension between the two is high, leaving an oblivious Roman and Repressed Virgil as he denies any feeling of romantic attraction. 
> 
> Song Roman Plays On Piano: “The Smuggler” by Schumann  
> Song on Virgil’s Phone: “Shower” by Becky G

[Author Note: The Sides do look different from each other in The Mindscape.  
Logan: Bright green eyes and straight black hair  
Patton: Baby blue eyes, wavy light brown hair, tons of freckles  
Roman: Wavy chestnut colored hair, heavy lidded “bedroom eyes”, small birthmark under his left eye  
Virgil: Mixed magenta and dark purple straight hair, heterochromic eyes (one purple, one green), eyebrow slit over purple eye

That’s All! ONTO THE CHAPTER!] 

Virgil has spent a good portion of his time in the mindscape staring at the tv, but not quite “watching it”. He was in his thoughts for the most part and the contestants in the current baking program on their television didn’t intrigue him that much to be honest. God knows why the damn thing was still on. 

It was all going in one ear and out the other. Muffled dialogue between the judges and the contenders. Why watch cooking shows when you could be contemplating all of your repressed emotions and existential dread instead? 

‘This is an hour of my life I’m never getting back. Wait. I’m immortal….Whatever my statement still stands.’ 

Logan angrily came into the common area, clasping his hands over his ears like if he let his vice-like grip loosen, they would fall off. Which with them as roommates, may be a benefit. Turning, he huffed and put his hands by his sides, balling up his fists. Looks like his ears were attached to his head the whole time. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be in control-“ he sighed through his gritted teeth. 

“Patton is in there, currently. We’re getting off topic! I think Roman is a tad bit mad….both emotionally and physically…He hasn’t stopped playing instruments ALL NIGHT. Piano, drums, guitar, BOTH ACOUSTIC AND ELECTRIC.” Virgil furrowed his eyebrows, narrowing his eyes at the Light Side. 

“And you’re telling me this, why?” Logan rolled his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“Just please talk some sense into him for my sanity’s sake. At least move the guy into his recording studio he has! At least that is soundproof…. You can tell when he is a little pissed as he plays louder and more difficult songs.” Virgil smugly smiled at Logan, who looked like he was about to have a mental breakdown.

“So, you want me to essentially shut Roman up for you? That’s what you’re saying?” Shooting Virgil a desperate look, he mouthed “please“. 

“Why not.” Giving a sigh of relief, he gave a soft smile. Virgil stretched as he stood, back cracking from having sat in the same position for hours. 

~Play the music now (if you’d like)~

Virgil teleported into the portion of the mindscape where their rooms were located, wide eyed as piano blared out from underneath the red door that led into nowhere else but Roman’s room. 

Logan wasn't kidding about Roman being angry. He was obviously not playing easy songs. Cracking the door slightly, Virgil leaned against the frame, making sure to stay out of Roman’s sight so he didn’t snap out of his trance-like state. A warm feeling swelled in his chest as Virgil found himself staring at the Prince’s expression as he played. 

His eyes shut and his eyebrows raised, Virgil closely inspected his concentrated face. Fingers moving in a rhythmic and elegant way, they went back and forth across the keys of the jet black grand piano he owned.  
Virgil softly chuckled. But it wasn’t because he thought he was attractive or anything. With his disheveled wavy hair and- ok, slow down, Virgil. 

‘He couldn’t help but think of how easy it would be to just slip into his room and kiss him discreetly. It’s not like any of the others would find out…’

‘REJECTION.’  
‘DESTROYED FRIENDSHIP.’  
‘PITY.’  
‘DESPERATE.’ 

Shaking himself out of his thoughts, he genuinely believed he was finally losing it. About time. He was arguing…..with himself. 

As Roman hit the last note, Roman’s gaze immediately examined Virgil in his doorway. Not creepy at all. More importantly, HOW LONG DID HE KNOW HE WAS STANDING THERE? 

‘Wait. How long was I standing there…’ Clearing his throat, he stepped into his room and gave a small smile. 

“So. Logan wants me to perform his dirty work and to shut up and stop because you’re driving him slowly insane. I agreed, came here, but heard you playing-“ 

Roman patted the piano bench next to him, Virgil’s sentence trailing off slowly as he examined the expansive room. So many beautiful instruments. Candles lit. String lights, and multiple polaroids of them. It was ridiculously cozy in there. A small room branched off the main room. 

‘Just going to guess that’s his recording studio…’ 

Even when blaring music, it felt so serene as Virgil took a seat next to the calmer Roman. 

“And?” A shy smile crept onto his face as he let himself press random piano keys in no particular order. 

“It was beautiful.” Roman smiled as he readjusted himself, side pressed against Virgil, who felt his face heat up at the contact. 

Roman turned towards Virgil suddenly, eliciting a small squeak from the boy as he silently facepalmed. 

‘Smooth as always, Virgil…’ 

“My own weird coping mechanism. Music keeps me sane. Geez, I’m starting to sound like you, Hot Topic. Sorry about getting all broody and bitter back there…” 

‘WAIT. IS THIS THE APOLOGY I’VE BEEN WAITING WEEKS FOR?!’ Virgil immediately started listening more intently to the boy as Roman wasn’t good with words, and he seriously took forever to own up to his mistakes. This was ridiculously fast coming from HIM. 

“Uh…, let’s just say I’m not too fond of the dark because-“ Virgil felt a pang of guilt as he looked up, narrowing his eyes at the Prince.

“Me?” Roman quickly shook his head and put his hands up defensively. Virgil let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as Roman tried to explain himself. 

“GOD! NO! It’s...actually, my brother. When we were little his curiousness got the best of him and he went in. Despite my warnings. I felt every second of his corruption, which felt like I was dying. Can thank him for that...He chose to throw away our entire friendship we had. We were so close as siblings too. I could feel he wasn't entirely pure. My biggest fear came alive that day. You, at least, deserve to know. I shouldn’t have hid it like I did.“ 

Virgil covered his agape mouth as all of the pieces started to fit together and make sense. That child that had crossed the border that day. It was Remus. That meant Roman wasn’t too far behind him. They were brothers. 

“Oh god, Remus is your twin brother?! That’s why he calls himself “The Duke”! You both have royal titles as nicknames! Well, I feel really stupid. It’s alright, Roman. I’m sorry too. By the way, a little advice?” 

Roman raised an eyebrow at him as he held one of his hands gently. 

“Don’t let the past haunt you too much. Scars hurt when you get them, painful to the touch and not very nice to look at. Scars don’t disappear, Princey. However, they do heal. Though, not completely. They will leave a permanent mark, but those scars do fade over time. Make sense? 

So, sure. The memory will always be there. So if you need to think about that moment, do it. But you also need to let that thought pass. Also, those scars. They show the world how strong you really are, and that it shaped you into who you truly are.” Roman hugged Virgil tightly, tears falling onto his jacket. 

“I-I needed to hear that, V-Virgil.” Smiling, he gently wrapped his arms around Roman.

“Anytime, Roman. Also, I just wanted to let you know the whole “Prince Hate” Joke was kinda supposed to be a hint at me not liking Remus, but I think you thought it was about you, and now I feel bad-“ Roman wiped his eyes and placed his hands on Virgil’s shoulders, smirking.

“You’re rambling, Patrick Slump.” Virgil was short circuiting currently as he wasn’t used to a lot of contact with other people. Not a people person. All this talk of relationships, however, had Virgil thinking of Roman in ways he wasn’t liking very much.

He felt all warm and fuzzy when he thought about him. Though, it was true, they had a very on and off relationship, but in the moments when they do get along, it seems to erase all the petty arguments and glaring they did to the other. 

And you quite literally can’t spell Romance without Roman. 

“I hope you know I don’t hate you, Virgil. Don’t think I ever did or could to be completely honest. The truth is I am confused by you. A lot. So I started backtracking to figure out why, and stalled when I remembered instantly putting my guards up when we first met in person. I never gave you a chance. So, I try to step back a little and let you take the wheel a little bit more.”  
Virgil sat confused, since when did they have so much in common with each other?!

“That was surprisingly...nice. When did you become so eloquent when you speak~” There was that random boost of confidence he got around Roman sometimes. He still couldn’t explain why it happened. 

“Well~Creativity is my department. Why are we talking like this, Virgil~?” Playfully batting his eyes, he leaned against Roman. 

“I don’t know~ We are such weirdos~” Both erupt into fits of laughter, Virgil falling into Roman’s lap as he held his stomach. Looking up, he saw Roman giving him a small smile. Leaning down, Virgil started to inwardly panic. It was like he could practically hear the call of the sirens as he was looking into his eyes. 

Suddenly, Roman stopped. Inches from Virgil’s face. 

“Get some rest, Virgil.” Virgil immediately sat up and left the room, briskly walking towards his. His mind was a whirlwind at the moment. If he had taken the chance, and leaned up to actually initiate a kiss between them, god knows how far things would have gone between the two sides. 

Every time he shut his eyes. He saw him. That look he gave Virgil. Shutting his door, slowly slid down it until he hit the floor. He was screwed.

“...royally. UGH!” He placed his earbuds in his ears, Tugging his hoodie strings tight as he put his playlist on shuffle. 

“Thinkin' of ya when I'm goin' to bed  
When I wake up think of ya again  
You are my homie, lover and friend  
Exactly why  
You light me up inside  
Like the 4th of July  
Whenever your around  
I always seem to smile~” 

He gave his phone an incredulous look as he plugged it in.

“WELL SCREW YOU TOO.” Tossing his comforter over him, he replayed what just happened over and over in his mind. Guess Virgil wasn’t sleeping this particular evening. Groaning, he glanced up at his ceiling. 

“Shit.”


	4. Cupid's Shit List

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil has a life changing realization after an event that occurs during a movie night with Roman....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's about to get real between Virgil and Roman, seeing as one of them is hiding a life changing secret and the other just gave their feelings away.

Trigger Warning: Depression, Swearing, Mentions of Self Harming

Virgil rubbed his eyes, praying to God to just let him sleep for once. Usually, he didn’t sleep. At all. Most of the Sides thought that it was because Virgil was just hyped up on coffee 24/7, and the caffeine prevented him from getting the proper amount of sleep each night. It is true, he is kept awake by coffee, but that wasn’t the only reason why he couldn’t. 

Not only did his sleep schedule not have any sense of order to it, his spirit creature carried over into his human form. He could shift into a bat whenever he felt like he wanted or needed to. Of course, bats are nocturnal creatures. So, he is more likely to be able to sleep at 2 PM than at 10 PM. Fun stuff.

Virgil genuinely believed he was going insane as he picked up his phone, giving an exasperated sigh when he saw the actual time. Two in the morning. Looking at his contacts, he mentally cursed himself for what he was about to do.

“Well, Princey most likely isn’t sleeping right now? Let’s bug him then.” Hesitantly, he typed up a text message and sent it to him before he could second guess himself. Not that he didn’t as his mind raced, Virgil chewing on his nails nervously. 

‘Don’t have anything interesting to talk about, but still wanted to talk to you, so...Hi. ~V’ 

Virgil watched his phone expectantly,but when he got no response, his hopes started to dwindle. Right as he threw the comforter over himself, he heard the ringtone. He was getting a FaceTime call, from unsurprisingly, Roman. So, he was awake this whole time.

“Hey there, Sunshine. Can you seriously not hear from your room what I’m doing all the time? Which right now, just so happens to be me bingeing Netflix as I eat popcorn in my bed.” SO, someone did make popcorn, he thought he was going crazy for the past hour because he could smell the damn thing. 

“Wow. Love when you talk dirty, Roman.” Roman winked and chucked a piece of popcorn at the camera. Virgil pouted, eliciting a chuckle from the Prince as he readjusted himself. 

“I’m genuinely considering going over there just because I want popcorn.” Giving a sly smile, he raised his eyebrows as Virgil curled up in his hoodie. Roman carded his fingers through his waves of hair, giving a small yawn. Blushing, Virgil quickly took a screenshot of Roman. NOt that he would ever admit to actually doing that. 

“Just saying, people have a hard time sleeping because they say someone else is thinking about them at the moment. Virgil, out of curiosity, what have you been thinking about lately?” Virgil’s blush deepened, realizing he had been thinking about Roman previously. Whoops. 

“Could ask you the same thing, Princey. Are you thinking about me? If so, please keep it PG-13! No rated R thoughts please.” Laughing, Roman rolled his eyes playfully.

“Oh, you wish! Though, now that you mention it, I was thinking about you. One of the characters in the Rom-Com I'm watching reminded me of you. Don’t worry you’re cuter than the actor is.” Virgil put a hand over his heart dramatically.

“Thank god. Can’t have anybody trying to one-up me on my cuteness.” Wait. Did he want cute Virgil? Fine. He’ll get it. Virgil let his hoodie cover half of his face and held the phone up over him. Looking at him with tired eyes, he gave a small smile. Roman’s face flushed noticeably, making Virgil’s smile turn into a smirk. 

“In all seriousness, if you do want some popcorn, we can pick some movies and have an insomniac movie marathon! I’ll make fresh popcorn and you can pick the movies! So?” Virgil could feel his mouth start to water over the thought of popcorn. Was he actually that hungry?

“I’m in. Let’s do this.” Changing into his pajama shorts and a long sleeved black shirt, he silently thanked god that black matched any color. Roman was downstairs, as Virgil could smell the popcorn again, and could hear the popping of the kernels. 

Tiptoeing over to Roman’s room, which was up the hall from his, he decided to let himself in. Awkwardly, he sat on the mattress. Well, more like falling onto the mattress. His bed was unbelievably soft and squishy. He also had tons of red and gold body pillows as well. Opening the door. Roman almost spilled the popcorn at the sight of Virgil smiling happily on the bed with his eyes shut. He looked like a content cat, purple hair sprawled across the pillows as he stretched out. 

In summary, Virgil was starting to enjoy Roman’s room more than his own. His was closer to a cave than it was to an actual bedroom. Tapping him, Virgil sat up quickly, picking at his sleeves out of embarrassment. Roman was wearing a white undershirt and red silk pajama pants as he handed him a mug. Looking at it curiously, it was hot chocolate. Smiling, he fumbled over his words as he thanked him.

“I-uh-I-, geez. Thank you, Disney Junior.” Roman jokingly bowed at the boy, Virgil and him both agreeing on “Maleficent” to watch. Putting in the disc, he walked towards Virgil, who was nibbling on a piece of popcorn and looking at the screen intently. 

Roman turned off the lights and flicked on his string lights, giving the room a soft orange tint and a more intimate feel. Virgil looked around as Roman sat down. The plasma television, the lights, the bed. 

Roman. 

‘Is this a dream? I’m probably asleep in my room right now.’  
Roman scooted a tad bit closer, their sides touching again like they did before. Virgil tensed up, making Roman back up, inspecting him.

“Sorry…If you are uncomfortable with that-” Virgil wanted to punch himself and his social anxiety in the face. 

‘Good going,Virgil. All he wanted was to sit next to you. Now, you made him uncomfortable!’

“No! I’m fine, just not used to that. I’m okay. Trust me.’ Roman nodded and scooted next to him again, gently pressing their sides together again, this time, without Virgil tensing up. He gave a small smile, Roman easing up again, knowing that he wasn’t causing him discomfort. 

They got through the intro of the movie before Roman raised his eyebrows and glanced over at Virgil. 

“Are you opposed to cuddling me, by any chance?” Virgil shook his head, and was 110% sure that this was a dream. Roman smiled brightly and sat Virgil up. 

“Here.” He outstretched one of his arms and put the other behind his head on the pillow. Slowly, Virgil laid down with his head on Roman’s chest and his arm over Roman’s torso. He felt Roman adjust his arm so that he was hugging Virgil from behind.

He had gone into a state of shellshock as he was never really used to feeling at ease, he had such a messed up way of viewing the world. For example, he saw himself feeling calm as an unnatural thing and that something was definitely wrong when it did happen to occur. Freaking out a little or a lot was Virgil’s normal in his position of embodying Anxiety itself. THough, sometimes his emotions get so out of hand that even he can’t stop it. 

His lack of anxiety was a break for Thomas though, Virgil constantly forgetting he didn’t have to be a complete jerk for people to listen to him, at least not around the Light Sides. HE was usually so gloomy, and downbeat. Now, though, he was experiencing a whole new level of peace. He remembered running away from the light sides. He felt like he wasn’t wanted. In the Dark or Light. The thought of not existing had crossed his mind back then. 

Just wanting a way out. To not exist. To die. Seeing himself as Thomas’ mess up. He was spectacularly wrong however. Each Side cared for him in different ways, even Roman felt bad about what had occurred that day. 

As Virgil later learned, he felt like he was the one to drive him away in the first place. He dealt with depression daily, and though he would never tell them, Deceit often whispered things into his mind that weren’t true. He had to constantly remind himself that he was a habitual liar. Virgil didn’t deny that he talked badly about himself though. 

The Light Sides hated that fact, and even went so far as to regularly remind him that he was better than he said he was. That he wasn’t expendable, and he was a major facet of Thomas for a reason, even if he had been a dark side prior to showing up in the Mindscape and the Imagination. He was just very vulnerable to insults and rejection. Go figure! 

Virgil did make a conscious effort to keep his head slightly off of Roman’s chest, until Roman pointed out his uncomfortable position. 

“You do know that you can put your head down, right Virgil? I don’t mind.” Virgil nodded, slowly letting his head down, resting his head on more comfortably on Roman. 

“You know cuddling is good for anxiety and depression?” Virgil blushed lightly as he watched the screen. Both wincing when Maleficent let out a blood curdling scream from the pain after the man she loved the most burnt off her wings. 

“What a bastard…” Both were unsettled by her screams, not that either noticed or really cared, but they would hold the other one tighter during the painful scenes as a way to protect and comfort the other from it. 

“God, that would be like burning off a limb.” The movie seemed to race by, and instead of actually sleeping, they just put in another movie. Virgil was aware that Disney movies had love scenes in them but he had never experienced them while cuddling with someone. 

~New and a bit alarming  
Who’d have ever thought that this could be?  
True, that he’s no Prince Charming but there’s something in him  
That I simply didn’t see…~

Roman’s gaze looked down to Virgil, who had happened to glance up at Roman at the same time. Both stared at the other, like they were trying desperately to read what the other one was thinking at that moment. 

Virgil smiled as Roman’s hand gently came up to rest gently on Virgil’s cheek, Virgil stunned as he looked at the boy.

‘Is Princey going to...ki-’

A loud alarm blared from the clock next to him, Roman backing up bashfully, and Virgil feeling like he wanted to smash the clock against a wall. 

“Apparently, it is 6 AM.” Virgil nodded slowly, shifting slightly. Virgil gave a heavy sigh, they did have lives they needed to live. But Virgil honestly couldn’t give a damn right now. 

“Time to start the day, I guess...Wanna go grab coffee?” Giving a nod, Virgil let out a yawn. In all truthfulness, he didn’t want to move at all, and instantly missed the warmth between the two of them. 

Going to throw on pants, Virgil smiled softly as he remembered how Roman’s facial expressions would change with the different scenes in Disney movies, and Virgil was completely enraptured by it. He would also talk about things in the movies with an excited tone in his voice. 

Weird. Normally, Roman’s Disney fanboying was annoying to him…

Narrowing his eyes, he replayed the whole piano ordeal and what just happened between the two. Something about them was different from all the other times. Who was he kidding? He knew Roman was going to try and kiss him! Why did he want it to happen though? Why did he want to chuck the alarm clock out the window for going off at the worst possible time? 

“It’s not like I like Prince. He is just a friend.” He swore he was going to gag at the word “friend”. His mind had decided to remind him of the screenshot he took of Roman while they were FaceTiming. He sat with his mouth open in shock until Roman’s voice snapped him back into reality.

“You coming, Virge?” Sighing, he shook his head, putting on a black beanie and his hoodie he wore almost everywhere. Tripping on his shoelaces, he almost went face first into the floor. 

“Y-yeah! One second!” 

Don’t like him. Don’t like him. Don’t like him.

Do like him. Do like him. 

“oh…….no…..” Racing out of his room, he went to meet Roman before he thought he died. 

He really needed that coffee now.


	5. Perfect Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys! This was a little delayed as I am healing from surgery currently (I’m all good, don’t worry) and hopefully will be able to write more consistently.
> 
> So:  
> A) I’ll try and write some more with my free time   
> B) I’ll apologize now for the ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We get a little insight on the characters, and I hope you enjoy how this chapter ends. 
> 
> If not, IM SORRY. (Dont skip to the end. It will ruin it.) 
> 
> Roman I believe does speak a tad bit of Spanish in this chapter, what he said was: “God, somebody is going to get killed.” 
> 
> Just to clear that up! Anyways, ONTO THE CHAPTER!

Roman fixed his hair as he waited by the front door for Virgil. One strand of his hair always stuck up in videos and right now it decided to start giving him grief again. That hair never stays put and at this point, it was getting borderline ridiculous with how often he had to fix the damn thing. He heavily doubted that Prince Charming had this kind of hair trouble. 

And though he did have the nickname “Princey”, he was far for being him any time soon. 

He hadn’t slept at all and oh boy, it showed. Roman’s eyes, though being heavy lidded, looked like he needed to sleep. Problem was, he wasn’t tired at all. Oh, the irony. A loud thud sound from upstairs caused him to quickly see red engulf his being. The same exact thing happened when Remus was getting hurt when they were younger. His aura flaring. It was Roman’s own version of Peter Parker’s “Spidey-Sense”. 

Roman’s very being telling him that someone or something was hurt or bothered. The boy tried to hide it from the others, even though he knew that Patton definitely had caught on after a while. He was a true father and it showed. Whether it was bad language or an illness. He’d find out eventually. All you really needed to do was connect the dots. Roman always left quickly after filming, and the Sides went through pain medication so fast, you’d think that it was a bottle of candy. Not quite. 

He went through pain medication pills quickly because of fights in Sanders Sides videos. Ignoring the flare ups in his aura was just about as efficient as trying to tune out a fire alarm. Sure, you can try to tune it out, but that doesn’t exactly mean it isn’t still alerting you that something has gone wrong. 

Other times, it’s more mild and not like being stabbed repeatedly with a sharp knife. Like when Patton cries over an ASPCA commercial. Man, Patton wanted a pet so bad. Now that Roman thought about it, Patton’s birthday was coming up and there was a shelter near them...Maybe. Just maybe…

“Gah!” Roman’s aura decided to be offended that he wasn’t listening so, why not stab Roman again? He definitely won’t just ignore it again! 

“Oh sweet Jesus. Why is my aura so sensitive?! You coming, Virge?” A shaky voice sounded from behind the ink black door, and the red light slowly faded away. Everything is fine. 

“Y-yeah! One second!” Sighing, the small boy raced out of his room. Inspecting his outfit, he felt his cheeks warm up slightly. Black ripped skinny jeans hugged his legs tightly, the holes in them showing off his alabaster skin tone, his normal baggy black hoodie, which was obviously bigger than it needed to be as it hung loosely on his shoulders, roomy sleeves hiding his hands from view. The scuffed black converse he wore had stars drawn on the console of them , in every size and color. 

Red, blue, black, green, pink…  
They were all drawn with ballpoint pens, and most likely were created out of sheer, absolute boredom. It was almost cute. 

Roman’s eyes widened as the word played over and over in his mind like a broken record. No. Not again. He may have changed, Roman would give him that, but he was still a dark trait. He had promised himself a long time ago not to mingle with them anymore. Though, he obviously wouldn’t label Virgil as a completely dark person. He would be a hypocrite if he did. Virgil was just protective over Thomas. Sometimes to an extreme extent, to the point where he would override Roman’s orders. 

He had loved a dark side once, and this is where it got him. Betrayed by a brother, but given a new family who cared, and though they could be overbearing at points, he couldn’t bear to lose anything or any part of them. 

Including Virgil. He may come off as an edgy emo nightmare, well, at least he tried to. Emphasis on trying. Inside he was the complete opposite. A literal sweetheart. Not unlike a Sour Patch Kid. 

He might get uppercut by Virgil if he said that to his face. In the words of Logan, “those are kinds of outbursts we internalize”. 

Despite Logan’s take on them being figments, he wasn’t quite sure what they were in actuality. He had come to the conclusion that the longer Thomas kept bringing them into the real world, the more real they became. They had evolved into something more ‘superhuman’. They weren’t human. They were human-like, yet they still possessed qualities people would consider ‘magical’. Teleporting. Aura flares. Shapeshifting. Phasing. 

They had possessed some weird form of free will. They just weren’t completely natural.

Thomas had managed to convince his friends that he had six different roommates living with him currently. 

Roman glanced out of the corner of his eye, watching Virgil’s hair bounce up and down with each stride he took. Virgil seemed to look like he was thinking about something, and wasn’t completely watching where he was going. His eyes were glazed over and pointed towards the uneven sidewalk. This was proven when a person on a bike sped past them, Roman pulling Virgil against himself seconds before the bike could collide with the boy. Virgil’s breathing sped up, each breath letting out clouds that slowly dissipated in the crisp, autumn air. 

“Dios, alguien va a morir.” Roman’s Spanish roots tended to come shining through when his emotions were running high. Couldn’t be bothered to speak English. Roman didn’t realize he still had Virgil in a tight embrace. With a concerned expression, he glanced down at the tensed up boy, frowning slightly. 

“Hey, you okay? We both know you and stressful situations don’t mix well…” Virgil’s flushed face shone even through his pale foundation, making him appear light pink. 

“Y-yeah, thanks....” Releasing him, Roman cleared his throat and kept walking with Virgil. A silence hung in the air between them, it wasn’t necessarily unpleasant, but you could definitely feel the tension between the pair. Roman ended up finding himself inspecting Virgil’s expression deeply. The way his eyes were always shut up partially. He stalled upon the sight of his black eyeshadow. Yes, it was true. Roman would wear a little makeup from time to time. HE wasn’t unfamiliar with lip gloss. It was something he found pleasure in. Sue him. Virgil glanced over at Roman, smiling softly. 

“Let me do your makeup.” Virgil gently placed a finger under his eyes, where black eyeshadow was applied hastily over his near white foundation. They really needed to get him one that matched his skin tone. Or at least some blush. 

He was seriously challenging Casper at this point. 

He gave a quiet “huh?”, and Roman wanted to slap himself for that. Now he made himself look stupid and embarrassed Virgil all at once. Good going, Roman. 

“Nevermind, it’s stupid…” Saved by the bell, the Starbucks was ahead. Roman went to walk faster until Virgil grabbed the sleeve of his flannel, gripping onto his arm. Roman let out a heavy sigh, knowing already that Virgil wasn’t going to let this go. He never does. Roman’s weakness was Virgil’s eyes. He just seemed to look through him. 

“So stubborn. Fine. Wanna sit and talk?” Virgil gave a gentle nod, making the corners of Roman’s mouth turn up into a smile. Going in, Roman went in line and Virgil sat down in a booth made for two people. Of course, Virgil never had to tell Roman his coffee order as he already knew it by heart. 

It wasn’t exactly the hardest order as Virgil just drank iced black coffee, but nonetheless, Roman knew what to order for the boy whenever they visited a coffee shop. 

Judging by the small smiles and whispers the girl who was working the register was feeling a little too fond of Roman. Even weirder, Virgil was not happy. He could feel the feeling growing steadily. Either he was angry or though it made him a little curious, jealous. 

It was either that or Roman now spontaneously had to vomit. 

‘Save me. ~R’ 

Without turning he heard footsteps and Virgil’s groan at not being able to teleport like usual. He maneuvered through the line of people until he was by his side. Quirking an eyebrow, he sighed and leaned towards him.

“You don’t seem to be in any immediate dang-“

“Ok. Look, do me a solid and pretend you’re my boyfriend.” Virgil almost dropped his phone on the ground in a state of severe confusion and honestly, Roman didn’t blame him for it. 

Rolling his eyes, he gave Virgil a look of desperation. He was just trying not to get hit on for once in his life. Whoever said being even slightest bit handsome did not bring up being hit on every five minutes. 

“Virgil. Look. I’m relying on you to save my ass currently. It’s not like you have to kiss me!” Chuckling, he leaned closer to Virgil’s ear, lowering his voice to a whisper. 

“Unless…” Virgil went completely pink, to the point where he was afraid he was going to end up with pink streaks in his hair. He shot what was supposed to be a glare at Roman, but it wasn’t very effective. 

Groaning, Virgil stuck out a small pale hand from under his ill-fitting sleeves. Holding it gently, Roman gave his hand a squeeze to reassure the boy that he was okay. It almost felt right, as if his hand belonged there.

‘I wonder how he would act if I put an arm around his waist, it was a joke, but if I could actually man up and ki-‘ 

“Order for Roman?” Oh, man. Virgil looked way too smug for the situation the pair was currently facing.   
Roman took the coffee cups, handing Virgil his carefully.

“It’s hot. Careful.” Virgil let out a soft ‘ok’ and Roman almost melted. It just sounded so innocent. So sincere. 

“Roman, is it? I just wanted to say I think you’re very attractive..” Virgil’s aura flared up again, but this time there was no restraint on hiding it. It was powerful.

He wasn’t happy. Usually his signifies danger in their proximity….why was he so on edge. What was he seeing as a threat?! 

His grip on Roman tightened significantly, and Roman was pretty sure he forgot they were supposed to be faking this. Virgil needed to stop his aura. Roman was going to pass out.

Virgil’s aura did quiet down a little bit, letting Roman regain his composure. It all seemed to happen in a series of seconds. 

Yelling.   
Offended looks.

Leaving. Roman went to ask about his issue and he was pulled into a kiss. 

By Virgil.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Are you enjoying the raging dumpster fire that is their relationship? Let me know if you’re enjoying this story!

**Author's Note:**

> So what do guys think of it so far? I'd love to hear your feedback on my attempts at an actual story!
> 
> Thanks for reading and I'll see you all in the next chapter!


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